Doing It The Old-Fashioned Way

Photo by Sailor Brinkley-Cook

Photo by Sailor Brinkley-Cook

Question: I often catch men looking at me or having eye contact with me for more than 3 seconds, but very few of them actually come up and talk to me. How can I let a man know I'm interested without chasing him?

We've become so accustomed to online dating; I think we've lost some of our confidence to flirt with strangers. When we lose the ability to plan every message or interaction, knowing how to communicate interest can be intimidating, and the possibility of rejection seems a lot more real.

To be approached, you need to be approachable. Something as simple as a smile radiates good energy and signals that you're comfortable with them coming over and initiating an introduction. Body language is a very powerful indicator; crossing your arms or looking down at your phone generally suggests you're not interested, so think about your posture and the direction you're standing. You can even flirt with foreigners who don't speak your language purely through facial expressions and body language. Helpful if you're trying to have an eat pray love experience this summer.

It's also important to remember that men fear rejection just as much as women do, so if he's not making the first move, take the initiative! You can start a conversation naturally by using your environment; if you're walking by each other, ask for directions or give out a compliment. If you're in a social setting, ask him about the music, or what drink you should try at the bar. And of course, you always have the option to flat out introduce yourself. Confidence is incredibly sexy.

The key in all of this is to be easy to approach and hard to keep. And if things don't pan out the way you wanted them to, don't take it personally! They're still a stranger after all, with a story that you don't know. Just putting yourself out there is a step in the right direction.

Lots of love,

Gabby xx